the ordeal of an american militiaman by the phong / translated by dam xuan can / dai nam van hien books, saigon 1970.

the ordeal of an american militiaman - 4-
saigon 1970


            the ordeal of an american militiaman
                                                      by the phong

                                                    TRANSLATED BY DAM XUAN CAN

 I was trusted driver of Senior American Adviser attached to the camp.  He was a half caste Chinese.  He had nothing when he came here.  But he had a charming little sister who had shinning, dark eyes and talked nicely.  She was the private secretary of Luna, Equipment Section Chief.  He was all powerful in fiscal matters affecting the whole camp.  Suppose Captain Le wanted an ashtray for example, he must aks Luna.  Also working with Luna were Misses Dung, Phuong, Ha -- all charming girls who registrated the three lovely words,

" I love you"  day after day like parrots

Every morning.after driving the Senior American Adviser to his office, he came to sit at the foot of a tree to learn English !  This bloody war had given opportunity to so many bastards ! And English had become an important ingredient in the life of so many of us !  The profiteers got rich overnight !  To be fair Y. had lived so poor so long.  Now he was trusted by the Senior Adviser, and given a pass providing him admission to all the American- sponsored associations ans American Clubs operating in the wastes of Vietnam.  He decided to became rich, taking vantage og his 'unique' situation.  Precisely, what could he do out of it . One day, he struck a new idea.  He wanted to make a fortune, 'honestly'.  Because he was not a position, neither was he prepared to take bribes like Tu, the personal chief of the Advisers HQ; He could not lick the boots of the Yankee like Tony Tuong, the notorious pimp. He decided to secretly collect Gilette razor blades in every American installations he could enter.  He thought of a Filipino having a Vietnamese wife who pilfered small goods of the camp little by little and now had a fortune.  Y. went ahead with his secret plan.  Every day he hided five packages of razor blades in his pocket in the morning, and another five in the afternoon. (none on Sunday, of course).  On the average, he took ten daily.  In only two years, he earned  handsome sum of money.

After finishing the story of the 'razor blades' millionaire, S. concluded,

 "  He is all right now, the bastards !" 

He quit the job, after his favorite adviser came home.  I only feel pity for his little sister.  Once Luna asked her to his apartment.  It was on aa raining night.  I need not tell you what happened.  The damned Yanks are famous all over the world for their kinkyness !   She had very little choice.  She gave in because she did not want to be dismissed.  You know, Dung suffred the same fate, but not entirely against her will.  Shame on her ! "

"But I think Y. is very good to his friend.  I am very happy to hear that he has become rich, in our society there are a hell lot of profiteers much worse than he is.  Pesonally, I think he has good nature.  If this is the case, I won' t object even if he steels as many as, say Twenty million razoe blades.  Do you not see that in Cat Lo Camp, the 'prostitutes'  and pimp like Tối Tóc Xoăn practised theft under the shield of the Boss.  As yet, nobody questions his respectability, but I think he should be held responsible all the same, don' t you think !

"The Camp was equipped with some tens of some tens of 140- litre refrigerators which had been practically put out of service because we used them recklessly, thinking they belonged to the Americans nad not to us.  More seriously, all the Neechi sewing machines had been carried away by the 'prostitures'. "

S. looked very  sad.  I was sure he was thinking of those who had become rich because of the camp.  He was going to leave and was still very much the same as the day he came to this damned place.  I tried to console him,

"Do not worry to much , my friend.  I think each of us has a destiny.  People become rich or poor in spite of themselves.  Take my case.  I have never thought of myself becoming an American militiaman like this.  Before I came here, I intended to volunteer to serve as private.  Now I have been working here quite a long time.  Finish the drink, and you will feel much better, my dear ! ".

Many readers, I am sure, have noticed that there are three seperate forced engaged in more or less the same basic activities.  These  are namely,

APA or BIET CHINH TIEN PHONG at Cat Lo Camp.
PAT or BIET CHINH NHAN DAN the first two course of which in the charge of an Aussie,
 Lt Colonel Hitcock.  In other words, they are the 'Dagger Aimed At Life'  men.

And last but not least, the CT ( Counter- Terror) Group trained by American and Australian advisers, G. Swicker is one of them.  Their coat of arms is a bat on the skull.

After Captain Le took command of all three camps, we instructors were to teach all trainees politics.  The idea behind this move was any cadre should be ideologically- conscious so that they could delete the Communists.  We had  a particular difficulty.  There were tremendous difference among the trainees regarding age, profession and social status. There were deserters ex-convicts, good- natured peasants, rich draft dodgers and white-collared with high school students.  Only  a few could grasp a 'high' lecture.  So I thought
 I had better impress them first and tutor later.  I intended togive them a spirit, rather than a simple of cold facts.   For example, to make the trainees adept the correct behaviour
 vis-a-vis women and next to impossible if the instructors could not behave preperly themselves.

Once, a menber in 8B Company of mine asked me,
   
" Lat Sundays we could not find you anywhere.  All the instructors got out in the streets".
I told Châu I used to come to Saigon or stay home, doing house work on Sunday".

Châu continued

" May I ask you another question.   Captain Le said that the Americans advise, I wonder why the 'Dagger Aimed at Life' plaque has not been stripped and why the 'bastman' did not bother to salute Captain Le?"

Those question showed that the responsible trainees were not quite happy about being trained for foreigners, directly or indirectly.  I did not tell the trainees that former Major Vo Hoang, formely assistant to Lt Colonel Hitcock was saboting Captain Le' s efforts since he took over the overall command.

As a matter of fact, he was caught between many antagonistes.  On the one hand, the Americans were still not wholly convinced about his program and leadership.  On the other hand, he was faced with a crisis of confidence as far as the trainees were concerned, caused by his statement the American had the power to advise only.  Anyway, all knew he had been hired by the Americans to do commissions for them.

This way why urged the instructors to expound the 'We Win Through Compassion and Earnestness' theme,  and yet had not the guts to order the Dagger plaque to be destroyed. It was understandable that the Counter- Terror men did not spare an ounce of respect for Captain Le, as they still received direct orders from Swicker.  They even drove GMC to surround Cat Lo after some of them were jilted by the female trainees in our camp.   When Captain Le wanted to enter the Counter- Terror camp,  he must come with American advisers; otherwise; Otherwise his security was by no means guaranted by anyone.

When Major General Nguyen duc Thang come to visit Ridge Camp, Captain Le escorted the General to see a class of No 4 Course of PAT.  It was a politics period conducted by Tôn. Instructor Tôn got stuck when the trainee put out a query.  So, Captain Le and adviser Red Winstead became very awkward in front of the dynamic General.

 I had the strange feeling many trainees were more interested in giving the instructors a hard time than in studying.  I am going to give a sample of an question answer session when I was in class.

A trainee asked,

"You have just told me what must show respect to women when we met on opeartion in villages.  But how we could we believe your words when we saw many of you roaming the streets to court girls on Sundays.  You have also said tha we cadres must give the villagers a generous deal in matters relating to money, so that they would rejoice at our coming, love us in our stay, and regret our going away.  But could you tell us what to do when the villagers refuse to seel foodstuffs to us.  If our persuasion fails, should we face starvation or breach our code of conduct? ".

Looking straight at him, I replied,

"Very good questions indeed. In answer to you first query, I reaffirm my strict code of conduct with women and girls.  Whenever any of you catch me doing this infamous set, stop me and tell me.  In answer to your second query, I would like to tell you of my experience as an ex combat soldier.  As you know, the Viet Cong had a firm control of all activities of the people.  If anyone dared to sell foodstuffs to our boys and th Viet Cong knew it, they would surely come back at night to question the person concerned.  You Know Năm Căn ? A lieutenant friend of mine once led his troops there on operation.  He was a poet, and romantically idealistic.  He ordered his troops to exert utmost care in their dealings with the locals.  They will judge the Government through the troops, he told his men.  They seldom saw the Prime Minister or even high ranking officicials;  Those with whom they came into contact daily were policemen, soldiers and the villages chief.  After camping one day and a half in the fields, his men had to enter the village to buy food because the ARVN' s did not have C- Ration.  The villagers refused to sell anything at all,  and the softest brand of diplomacy got the soldiers nowhere.  Officers and soldiers were hungry alike.  At noon the following day, two soldiers invited the Lieutenant to have rice with chicken.  The Lieutenant thought that patience had paid off at last.  Then one of the soldiers got the courage to tell him the truth; they had taken the chicken by force and paid fifty piasters to the owner.  The Lieutenant said nothing.  But I think you know his feeling anyway ."

That trainee was so keen- minded he did not give in. He repeated his second query,

"We still want to tell us how to well behave with the opposite sex?"

I continued, 

" Each of us has a lovable mother, a sister he deeply cares for, or failing that, an aunt whom he respects and loves.  When I want to resist temptation  I look at the coverted woman through the image of a mother, a sister or an aunt.  I concede this is  not good enough to many, but it is the only remedy I can think of".

Then all the bastards clapped their hands in unison.

Our teaching problems are very minor ones, compared with those of the cadres in action.  Preaching is easy, but practise is much more difficult, according to a certain Chinese philospher named Vuong duong Minh.

After eating their fill in a Vung tau shop, a party of 'batsmen' paid the shopowner a 'taken' hand grenade nd said, 
"Du me (*) you know who you are Tke this M26 and forget about the meal will you?"
---
* Literally," I owe your whore of a mother. " (TR)

Do not agree. that the chances of winning the hearts and minds of the people of these chaps are not rosy at all !  Should we resort to the piaster (Let us forget that one dollar is worth 200 Vietnmaese piasters)?  Knowing this, you would not be told a single word by Swicker was more than a dozen of long speeched by our leader, Captain Le.

The full name of the Adviser  was Red Winstead.  The Vietnamese referred to hom as Red Tóc Đỏ (*) or Red Bánh Tét  (** ).  The Vietnamese are traditionally very keen on Black' humor.  Nothing is safe from their mockery, especially things related to the ruling men.
---
*      Literally, Red- haired.
**   The moon- shaped rice cake served in Têt time. Vietnamese people  consisder round- featured persons as good but stupid.(TR)

In the Ngo dinh Diem era, the people were so fed up with hearing the song "God save the President ! " broadcasted daily by the Vietnamese Forces Radio Station, they urged their kids to sing as follow,

" All Vietnamese are grateful fot the bowl of Chinese soup.
" May it live for ever !  May it live for ever ! "  (*)
---
*  Vietnamese is a tonal language.  Words with the same tone yield the same musical effect. Here are the original stanza nad its modified version : " Toàn dân Việt nam nhớ ơn Ngô tổng thống, Ngô tổng thống muôn năm.  Toàn dân Việt nam nhớ ơn Tô hủ tíu, Tô hủ tíu muôn năm !"  Please note the discritical marks above the words . (TR)

 [... ]

Now the  PA cadres were very keen on crooning this obscene pharse,
" Do you know, my live ! One week has clapsed since you last teased my prick".

As a matter of fact the calling, Red of the Center of Earnestness and Compassion plus the Dagger Aimed At Life Red Bánh Tét was nothing.  I did hear Dalat University Students asking each other,
" Did you bring Ambassador Lodge (*) with you ? " when they came to the red light area.
---
*  The sheath, or 'French letter', is called 'capote' in French.  Its Vietnamese phonogical translation sounds very much like the middle name of the Americnn Ambassador to Vietnam, Henry Cabot Lodge . (TR)

I still remember my fist encounter with Mr Red Winstead in the military airfield in Tan Son Nhat, where we boarded the Cessna of Air America (*) to fly back to Vung Tau on Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Saturday.  I was at the airfield at 7 Am one morning to wait for the flight back.  Among the other passengers were adviser Dowell, Swicker, and Nguyen dac Qua, a Vietnamese chap.   I saw Qua was busy carrying the luggage for Red and flattering him.  Dowell was also reverent to Red.  I ignored them all.  Suddenly Red asked me, 

"What is your name ?" (**)
---
*   Air America is the CIA' s own linw operating in South-East Asia. 
**  In English in the original text. (TR)

I said my name, showing him the  'ticket' of Air America. Dowell said to him that I worked in Cat Lo with Captain Le.  I said nothing more. My coldness had Red bloody worried.  Later, when I saw him again in this Seminary camp, he smiled to me. I smiled back and we talked for a good while.

There were three types of instructors in the three camps, namely political instructors, military instructors and medical ones.  Everybody was a bit afraid of Red as he had the power to fire anyone.  In the days we were still in Cat Lo, political instructors were the least paid of all.  All were to sat in the camp, and to receive free laundry service, free clothes, free coffee.  A third rand instructor got 9000 piasters.  Those who did not in could claim  $2000 for living. allowances. Bu Captain Le requested us to refuse this claim. We half- heartedly agreed with him.  When the three camps were merged, the same regualtions applied to  all.  We more quite happy about it.  The luckiest were interpretors and medical instructors  got one and a half pay for weekday overtime and double pay for Sunday overtime.

As Christmas draw near, there was quite a stir among us, because Captain Le suggested that we refused to receive the 13 th month salary.  Fortunately for us, we got it as the advisers insisted.

Prior to his return to America, Red convened a meeting of political instructors. Red and Captain Le jointly presided over it.  Red gave an address in English first, then Captain Le interpreted for him,

"You all have done a very good job for the centre.  Please accept my congratulations.  Some of you might find me difficult, probably because I seldom smiled.  But I do care for you.  Recently, the Embassy asked me to provide you all 100 percent security.  This is why
 I must say I am sorry, but you won' t be allowed to go on exercise with the trainees anymore, although Captain Le nas some of you volunteer to go.  All we require of you is to indoctrinate the trainees so that they can confront the Viet Cong political cadre ."

Now I knew the meeting had been convened because some associiates of Captain Le had volunteered to go on exercise with the trainees.  Apart from his genuine care for us, Red also had respect for Vietnamese women, although he had a temporary wife, Miss Nguyet, one of the food supplier.  After Misses Thuong and Nguyet had won the contract for all the three camps, the trainees staged a hunger strile to protest against inadequate food. Captain Van, the third Boss offered to be the trouble shooter.  The trainees whispered to each other.

"The hunger strile will achieve nothing!  Captain Van will do anything at all to protect Miss Thuong.  We must resort to a new strategy.  When we are given good food, we will sing
 " We are real unfair, lovely Miss suplier" to the tune of the pop song "O Saigon, you are a real beauty !".  OK? "



A rumor in the air, " A Chinese had offered a bribe of three hundred thousand piasters a year to get the food and catering contract ! "  Did it come from the men of Major Vo Hoang, the assistant to the Aussie Lt Colonel Hitcock, or from Le Dung, former husband of Misss Thuong?  We only knew it was meant to undermine the prestige of Captain Le in the eyes of the instructors.

A military instructor friend of mine said to me,

" Du Me ! Thuong is more and more sexy, don' t you see ?  Her pants are made of My A silk  She is the chick of Captain Van, so ,don' t buy trouble by running after her, do you ? Once
 I came to find Le Dung at the order of good old Red, I knew he was in his room, but he did not answer me. I came out and saw his car parked next to Thuong' s car.  That' s it. They made love in daytime.  This place is completely corrupt, don' t you see? "

I answered,
"Is that you knew

" Come on, man, replied he, " I know you have been fined on salary many times  because spy Trinh xuan Sang ( real name of  Toi Tóc Xoăn) reported Captain Le about your arrival and departure times.  I know you are not  man of the HQ, so I can talk to you freely.  By the way, did you know Captain Le reaction to the bribe offer of the Chinese contract tender?  Three thousand piasters is quite a sum, isn' t it ?"

 "I did not know about it at all, I said,  But I think he has nothing do with it. To the best of my knowledge, Luna and his 'prostitutes' are the only ones to decide about it! "

Angered by my ignorance, my friend had a big gulp of beer, and then said,

" Don' t you say that any of them is incorruptible !  Miss Thuong had been opearting a big pigsty in Vung Tau; Captain Van and his men got their shares in this enterprise too !  It is the same in any society. Du Me !  It is money which makes the world turn.  In the meeting the bastard said that we should not waste even a blank sheet of paper.  But I know Captain Le did ask the instructors to explain to the trainees that to waste a single sheet of paper was to misuse the national property.   This availed to nothing good.  To the end of each course, (when the trainnes did not have to work much) I saw the trainees making corduroy jeans out of the velvet curtains in the meeting hall, and destroying their mats, and blankets, furniture. They said that this free for all us of the equipment was not doing harm to the country.  All these belonged to the Yanks, so they did not give them a damn.  Captain Le' s teaching only made them laugh their heads off.  Because everyone in this place knew Captain Le was but nobody hired by the Yanks.  The military and medical instructors were commanded by the American and Australian advisers, who had full power over them.  When an American was dissatisfield with someone, Captain Le could not fire a guythe American liked. It was perfectly clear to all that Captain Le' s words had not weight whatsoever  over the persons directly working with Luna.  Strangely enough, Cpatain Le tried to make the trainees believe he was the real Boss, and he was not under the direct supervision of the Americans.  This state of affairs caused so many funny stories around this place.

Captain Le banned too sexy dress.  Who did not agree to such a sensitive move ? And yet, this affected aonly a couple of girls working in his room.  It was completely ignored by Misses Dung, Ha, and the girls from the Personnel Pay and Maintenance Sections.  He was more powerful to than the King of Annam, (*) to the French citizens.  A story involving Captain Le and Miss Dung was the talk of the whole centre in the last days of Christmas 65.
---
* The name of Vietnam under the French domination. (TR)



The Seminary camp used part of the premises of the Redemptorist Seminary of Vung Tau. The Redemptorist got a rental of something like forty million piasters for forty years.  The nicest three storeyed building was the Headquarters of the Joint School of Political Action. The third storey was occupied by the Captain Deputy Commanding Officer and the girl in the Luna delegation.  As his room was the top end of the corridor, he should go past a row of rooms before reaching his place.  At dusk one day, when on his way there saw Miss Dung, the pay girl walking to and fro with a tight jeans and no underwear whatsoever.  Looking up from the yard, the trainees gave her a standing ovation.  Wanting to prove what he was the Boss, he ordered Miss Dung to out short her sinister show.  She ran into the room and slammed the door.

Angry Captain Le came to knock the door,
"For God' s sake, open the door, Dung.  I have something very important to tell you."

Dung was giggling but did not answer. Captain Le kept calling in vain.  At last, he asked his cook, Miss Thao Ngoc to come. Dung still refused to open the door.  Angry- looking, exasperated he took his American car for a drive to Vung Tau Beach.  A few trainees whispered to each other. ,
" I am willing to be a revolutionary for life if I have the comforts of Captain Le".

I did not know whether Captain Le heard this or nor, but I was sure his heart was boiling : The girl who challenged his power was the age of his girl. ( Although he had none).
Recently, instructor Viet came to sk him,
 Could you tell me how to answer the often raised query, " Why 'the Dagger Aimed At Life' plaque is still in its place. What is it used for ?"

This irrittated him a lot.  He knew he was still on probation as far as the Americans were concerned.  He should consult the American Embassy to have the plaque stripped off.  But as long as iy stayed in front of Seminary and Ridge Camp (*), he could hardly improve image in the eyes of the trainees. 
---
* Now renmaed Phù Đổng Camp and Bách Việt or Chí Linh Camp . (TR)

When Captain Le came back from his drive, he saw Dung and other girls swinging around, in the bright neon light.  He rushed upstairs and came knocking Dung' s room door, " I have something very important to say to you."
" Father, wiat for me a shgort while, Dung answered out, giggling promiscuously, " I am still naked, don' t you know?"

 I did not know what happened after that.  But I thought it should have been painfully funny .



The after hours rendez- vous spot of the instructors was the famous café Aux Délices which we call Brodard of Vung Tau.  It was very tastefully furnished. Although the café did no have a Wurlitzer juke box, we did not find any in convenience.  The manager hostess chose our favorite records and operated the record player herself.  The 'human' Wurlitzer of the whole Vung Tau was Miss TỴ  (or TITI) , the manager hostess of café Aux Délices.

She was not  perfect beauty, but her charms were irresistible.  Each of us liked her and found in her something congenial to his taste.  Among the most notorious suitors were a captain, two lieutenants, an painter warrant officer (who painted her many times (and some instructors.  None of them got to her heart, unfortunately !

 Captain X. got married but could not forget his old flame.  One day as I was sitting in the café, Miss TITI pointed at the mini- skirted woman cuddling a baby, walking in the shop,
"Here is Mrs Captain X. I have often told you about him.  He felt madly in love with me",
 I could not love him, he got married.  But he still bothers me.  Could you advise me about what to do about this ?"

All, I could do was to smile.  I remained pensive for a good while.  Suddenly, an instructor rushed in.  This chap was well known for his art of persuasion.  The trainees were mad about him.  One of them said once,
"Gee, He lectures very well.  I particularly remember his definition of the multi- job cadre.  According to him, a multi- job acdre can do anything at all, no matter how strenuous were  wrong.  Than he slowly continued, " That' s giving birth.  Only women can do this, right? 
 I like him a lot".

Seeing me in a somber mood, the instructor said, 
" Do you want to talk  to TITI or what?  I hope you don' t try to make the cadre give birth".

Smiling thinly, I answered,
" I know you can persuade the trainees.  But can you entertain Miss TITI here ?  Tell me."
He said,
" That is too big for me.  Do you want to make love?  You need not bring the body guard Ambassador (*) with this one reserved for the instructors.  Remember her?  A bastard of an instructor had ruined her life, forcing her to become a prostitute".
---
* a sheath.(TR)

" Spare me,  I don' t want Captain Le to complain"/
" Don' t you worry about that ?  Don' t you see I have won the trust of the Captain?".

I did not want to go.  My friend want away after a big gulf of 33 beer. I suddenly remembered a woman I had made acquaintance with just recently in a bus.  In that 'historic' trip, the ascetic Captain was unmasked by her completely.  Upon hearing my telling I was an instructor, she rushed to ask if I knew Captain Le.  I nodded and she proceeded to tell me a most secret phase in the life of the potential leader ...



Our famous poetess Hồ xuân Hương.  Whether she describes a bread fruit. a fan or any other thing, we have a very clear impression that there is something behind the real form and colour of the thing so vividly sketched.  In the same way, we could hardly know a Vietnamese just by looking at the appearance.

I had just returned from leave.  I  had visited my fiancée in Dalat.  I was given three days only.  Dalat is 300 kilomters from Saigon anhd Vung tau 123 kilometers from  Saigon. So,
 I had to go nearly 900 kilometers in three days.

Supposing I returned five minutes late, I would be fined 2000 piasters I thought the fine collected since the days Captain Le ordered it amouted to at least 100.000 piasters.   How this great sum of money was spent, no one knew for sure. As my fines were no less than 10.000 piasters, I since hope the beloved leader did not use the money for personal purpose.  If the readers will forgive me for my too liberal interpretation of the Captain' s two- staged , three- fronted Revolution, I will say that the real embodiment of this sort of revolution is the captain and the above- mentioned woman.

The first concern of politicians is to hide all real feelings, good and bad alike.  They get the impression the men in the street would not hold them in respect if they see nothing special about them.

Alas, my Captain Boss was not a good actor.  I knew he liked women very badly. Fortuna- tely fro him, he already got a woman.  The wife of my Boss was suave and intelligent, but she was sterile.  This meant my Boss could not have a child to carry out his grand job of indoctrinating the people of Vietnam about the dangers of Communism and the need for Democracy USA style.  Did he want to have a child with another woman ?

I felt thrilled with this theory, which was so conclusively 'proved' later in a bus conversation with a woman on the way from Saigon to Vung Tau, on a Sunday.

The woman in the seat next to mine was in her late thirties.  She was not very beautiful, but by no means ugly.  More than that, she was very sexy. She began by asking me the time.  I told her the time and sat still. She then enquired whether I worked at Vung Tau and I con-firmed it.  But I said nothing more.  After the bus went past Ba ria, I started talking to her. She took aout a Salem cigarette, which I promptly lighted with a Zippo.  We talked a lot and she was obviously very interested in me.  I almost forgot everything she said with the exception of her revealing words about the Boss. (After she started calling me by pet name).
" Oh yes, I know him well.  I called him, my love Le.  After he graduated from the No 8 Course in the Military College in Dalat, he wanted to marry me.  Our affair came to end, because of what I diid not know.  O think because I was unlucky.  Now he becomes the Captain Deputy Commanding Officer of an important school and I still lead a wretched life.  You know, I got married to a sergeant serving in faraway place.  I have two kids and have to work hard to feed them.  Last week, my husband came back and urged me to come to live with him in Central Vietnam.  I did not want to go to such a desolate place. You know Ashau ? Itis near the Laotian border.  I loved him but I did not go with him. Some days ago, my love Le came to my place in a American car with diplomate number plate.  He told me he was still single and his life had been very lonely.  He wanted me to live with him. He stayd late in the night. He gave my children 5000 piasters. He told me he was still single.and his life had been very lonely. He wanted me to live with him.  I said I had been married.  He then urged me to seek a divorce.  I replied I did not hate my husband to that point.  He said I had better think my husband was dead, because to live in such a dangerous place like Ashau was like to be condamned to a death sentence which could be carried out any time at all.  I still did not agree with him.  Angered and frustra-
ted, he went away at mignight ..."

Then I was not married a bit about being fined.  I had met theo sweetheart of my Boss and I intended to do with her what my Boss had not succeeded in carrying out.  To avenge him and myself.

Thinking so, I said, 
" I am still single, I want to get married, but I think I am too old". 
" Not at all, my dear, replied she,  You thirty, right?  I cannot say for others.  As for me, had I met you before I got married, I would fallen to your knees ".

 When I get out of the bus to go to the camp, she said to me,
" I' ll wait for you in front of the front juice shop, near Vung Tau Market at 8 PM to night.  Be sure to come".

I nodded and walked slowly toward the camp.  I had a look around to see whether my Boss' s car was somewhere.  Then I asked the orderly officer where my Boss was.  He said the Boss was on business in Saigon.  Suddenly I lost the interest in the rendez- vous at night. Had my Boss been here, I would have gone ahead with the plan.  And I was sure I would stay at night. And I wanted to meet my Boss in her place.  I was like the old story of a student confronting his master in a brothel.  As a matter was very keen in expounding the duties of a young man to himself, to his family and to his fatherland -- in short, the comminity in which he lived, he denounced the permissiveness of the unhealthy society, blatantly evidenced by the innumerable houses of abd reputation . (*)
---
* An euphenism for knocshop. (TR)

But at last, both of them had to face their moment of truth in a unexpected emcounter in a brothel.

 Likewise, I badly wanted to get to know the real personality of my boss without the label 'revolutionary'.  An excellent occasion to do this was to meet him at his sweeheart' s house.  I was willing to accept whatever punishment he would impose on me for doing this.  I would not miss such a good occasion for anything in the world.  I particularly like these lines of Hồ xuân Hương ;

                                 I am like a bread fruit on the tree
                                 My skin is rugged and my flesh is juicy
                                 If you do love me, gentleman
                                 Nail me up with a wooden nail
                                 And do not touch me lest the resin soil your hands (*)
---
* The Vietnamese poems reads, 

                                 Thân em như quả mít trên cây
                                  Da noa sần sùi, múi nó dày
                                  Quân tử có thương thì đóng nõ
                                  Xin đừng mân mó nhựa ra tay 
                                              HỒ XUÂN HƯƠNG
                            

I wanted the Boss to know the poem!  But when I knew he had gone to Saigon, I changed my mind.  I changed my dress and went to bed.  When I woke up, it was already 10 PM. Alas! I had missed the rendez- vous with the sweeheart of My Boss !

THE PHONG

                                                                                       (to be continued)